1 00:00:15,351 --> 00:00:17,351 Sync and corrections by APOLLO www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:19,080 --> 00:00:22,319 Thank you so much. Hello! 3 00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:26,039 Hello and welcome. Thank you, everybody. Thank you. 4 00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:30,719 Now, even though this programme has taken a terrible battering 5 00:00:30,720 --> 00:00:33,319 in the newspapers in recent weeks, 6 00:00:33,320 --> 00:00:36,040 we have made every effort we possibly can 7 00:00:36,041 --> 00:00:38,759 to make sure this series is unaffected. 8 00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:42,566 Thank you. Thank you, really. 9 00:00:42,605 --> 00:00:44,050 Thanks very much. 10 00:00:44,074 --> 00:00:47,799 So, coming up now is a montage of what you can expect 11 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:49,760 over the next seven weeks. 12 00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:57,159 57 miles to the gallon! 13 00:00:57,160 --> 00:01:00,959 So, spacious... and economical. 14 00:01:00,960 --> 00:01:03,079 Going through the first corner... 15 00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:06,640 And THAT is how a camshaft works. 16 00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:10,520 Mate! 17 00:01:11,560 --> 00:01:15,319 No-o-o! There's been a bit of a mistake. 18 00:01:15,320 --> 00:01:17,660 THAT is the tape we sent to the newspapers 19 00:01:17,661 --> 00:01:19,999 in the hope they'd be fooled into thinking 20 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:24,399 that's what we'll be doing. What we're actually doing is THIS! 21 00:01:26,190 --> 00:01:30,989 No! That's not what I wanted to see in the mirror! Heading to the side... 22 00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:37,869 There he is! There he is! 23 00:01:39,031 --> 00:01:41,470 Turning left into Acacia Avenue. 24 00:01:41,920 --> 00:01:44,680 Over there. Over there. Go over there! 25 00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:48,719 Buffeting! Buffeting! 26 00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:50,640 He's The Stig's Chinese cousin. 27 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:02,039 Hold onto your spine. 28 00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:04,880 Johnson makes a good start. 29 00:02:07,049 --> 00:02:09,568 Come on, you little bugger! 30 00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:12,390 Man alive! Are we getting some shots here?! 31 00:02:12,750 --> 00:02:14,670 Thank you. Just browsing. 32 00:02:18,580 --> 00:02:21,339 Stretch it, stretch it, stretch it! Come on! 33 00:02:25,460 --> 00:02:27,620 How's that possible? 34 00:02:31,580 --> 00:02:35,170 That was beautiful. 35 00:02:39,700 --> 00:02:45,233 All of that is to come, but we kick off tonight with this. 36 00:02:45,319 --> 00:02:47,419 Yes, because this is important. 37 00:02:47,420 --> 00:02:52,358 Let's say you want a mid-engine supercar but, for some reason, 38 00:02:52,443 --> 00:02:54,330 you don't want a Ferrari 458. 39 00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:56,519 What is best for you? 40 00:02:56,520 --> 00:03:00,759 Now, naturally, of course, us three could not agree on a solution on this, 41 00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:03,820 so the producer said we had to settle our 42 00:03:03,821 --> 00:03:06,880 differences with a road trip across Italy. 43 00:03:11,180 --> 00:03:16,579 'The meeting point was the beautiful town of Lecce, in the heel of Italy, 44 00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:18,680 'and I was the first to arrive.' 45 00:03:20,722 --> 00:03:24,963 This is the McLaren MP4-12C. 46 00:03:27,261 --> 00:03:31,679 It's a car made with an almost psychotic attention to detail. 47 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:35,399 It's very technical. It's why, I think, it probably suits me quite well. 48 00:03:35,400 --> 00:03:42,240 Then Jeremy arrived in a car that suits HIM quite well. 49 00:03:44,040 --> 00:03:46,839 Morning, shrinking violet. 50 00:03:47,491 --> 00:03:48,807 This... 51 00:03:51,389 --> 00:03:53,869 is a Lamborghini Aventador. 52 00:03:55,480 --> 00:03:58,480 What I love most of all about this is that 53 00:03:58,481 --> 00:04:01,479 Audi did all the boring engine and wiring bits 54 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:06,039 and then let Lamborghini go mad with the styling. 55 00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:09,799 It looks better than yours and, therefore, it IS better. 56 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:13,799 I agree. As a poster, as Lamborghinis always have been, it is superb. 57 00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:15,239 It looks great. 58 00:04:15,240 --> 00:04:17,720 But it's a bit of a dinosaur, to be honest. It is. It is. 59 00:04:17,721 --> 00:04:22,199 It's too big, it's too wide. I'm sorry?! This, you just know... 60 00:04:22,200 --> 00:04:25,399 All they ever talked about was G. They were sitting going, 61 00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:29,079 "How can we make it go round a corner a little bit faster?" 62 00:04:29,080 --> 00:04:34,239 It's a supercar. "So give it guns! Let's give it guns! Space rockets!" 63 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:36,760 This... they will have had seven years of 64 00:04:36,761 --> 00:04:39,279 meetings to get to that windscreen wiper. 65 00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:42,100 So it works properly. What's wrong with that? 66 00:04:42,101 --> 00:04:44,919 Lamborghini would've said, "Why don't we use a laser? 67 00:04:44,920 --> 00:04:48,359 "Why don't we have lasers shooting heat onto the windscreen to...?" 68 00:04:48,360 --> 00:04:50,140 That's why I love Lambos. They're mental. 69 00:04:50,141 --> 00:04:51,919 Have you had a lot of pop today? 70 00:04:51,920 --> 00:04:57,319 'At that moment, Hammond arrived, in a Noble M600.' Yeah. 71 00:04:57,320 --> 00:05:01,039 So, Hammond... Morning. Let's just get this straight. 72 00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:04,359 You think there are people in the world who are going to say, 73 00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:08,919 "No, I don't want something Italian and exotic. Don't want a Ferrari. 74 00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:11,620 "I want something built on a light industrial 75 00:05:11,621 --> 00:05:14,319 unit in Leicestershire"? No, because... 76 00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:16,940 No, wait a minute. Sorry. You buy this, I think, 77 00:05:16,941 --> 00:05:19,559 because it's got the engine from a Volvo XC90. 78 00:05:19,560 --> 00:05:24,039 No! Yes, the engine may be from a Volvo, but it's made by Yamaha. 79 00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:26,540 It's twin-engine, it's absolutely magnificent, 80 00:05:26,541 --> 00:05:29,039 and this car, above everything else, is light. 81 00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:32,959 Comparing these... it's like comparing me with you. 82 00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:38,119 The power-to-weight ratio is insane. 541 brake horsepower per tonne in there. 83 00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:41,719 That's Bugatti Veyron territory, and you know it! 84 00:05:41,720 --> 00:05:46,679 This is going to crush you guys like beetles under its feet. 85 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:51,000 Soon, our cars started to draw a bit of a crowd... 86 00:05:52,560 --> 00:05:55,340 so the producer said we should leave the town 87 00:05:55,341 --> 00:05:58,120 and go for a little drive in the country. 88 00:05:59,600 --> 00:06:01,680 Bloody hellfire! 89 00:06:09,198 --> 00:06:11,278 Quite good. 90 00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:15,260 You are probably sitting there, thinking, "Hold on! 91 00:06:15,261 --> 00:06:17,319 Why would I spend £228,000 92 00:06:17,320 --> 00:06:22,479 "on a car with no airbags or anti-lock brakes, made in Leicester?" 93 00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:24,999 But that's missing the point. 94 00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:27,999 If I were to ask those two what the best supercar ever made is, 95 00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:29,879 I know what they'd answer. 96 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:31,319 Ferrari F40. 97 00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:35,799 There's something of the Ferrari F40 about this. 98 00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:40,359 Something to do with the way it rides on the road, the way it feels. 99 00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:42,200 The simplicity of it. 100 00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:48,239 I buy the argument for a flamboyant supercar. I get it. 101 00:06:48,240 --> 00:06:50,319 But maybe there is another way of doing it. 102 00:06:50,320 --> 00:06:52,840 There's a sort of joy in things that simply 103 00:06:52,841 --> 00:06:55,359 work really well, like this gearbox. 104 00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:58,999 It's sort of like a two-stage trigger on a sniping rifle... 105 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:03,160 you can preload it with half a ball... and then change. 106 00:07:04,160 --> 00:07:06,319 It's very satisfying. 107 00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:12,359 Maybe really anal attention to detail will have a charm of its own. Let's see. 108 00:07:12,360 --> 00:07:14,620 James and Richard can make as many arguments 109 00:07:14,621 --> 00:07:16,879 as they want, but the fact is this. 110 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:20,799 They're driving about in Virgin Cola. 111 00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:24,039 It's not the real thing. This is the real thing. 112 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:28,719 Lamborghini invented the supercar with the Miura, 113 00:07:28,720 --> 00:07:33,119 the world's first mid-engine speed and dream machine. 114 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,959 I mean, yes, this is the most expensive car here. 115 00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:40,159 A quarter of a million pounds. But who cares? It's a dream car. 116 00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:42,580 You don't dream about going to Filey or Bridlington. 117 00:07:42,581 --> 00:07:45,000 You dream about going to Tahiti. 118 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:49,239 Actually, Tahiti's terrible. I went there once. 119 00:07:49,240 --> 00:07:51,600 It was full of Americans looking at dolphins. 120 00:07:54,760 --> 00:07:58,399 'Half an hour later, we were told to brim the tanks in our cars 121 00:07:58,400 --> 00:08:02,959 'and pay careful attention to the challenge we were about to receive.' 122 00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:05,640 Hang on a minute. "You will now see which of 123 00:08:05,641 --> 00:08:08,319 your cars can achieve the highest speed." 124 00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:11,039 That'll be mine. It's as simple as that. 125 00:08:11,040 --> 00:08:12,719 It's the fastest. 126 00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:16,799 "How fast your car can go is not relevant." It sort of is. 127 00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:19,599 "It's how fast you dare drive it." 128 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:23,519 'The location for this challenge was the Nardo test track, 129 00:08:23,520 --> 00:08:29,840 'a banked 8-mile circle of tarmac so vast it can be seen clearly from space. 130 00:08:32,480 --> 00:08:38,399 'No car can achieve its true top speed here because it's one endless corner. 131 00:08:38,400 --> 00:08:40,720 'But it is one of only two or three places 132 00:08:40,721 --> 00:08:43,040 in the world where they can get close. 133 00:08:45,920 --> 00:08:51,359 'Lamborghini and McLaren had both sent technicians to make sure their cars, 134 00:08:51,360 --> 00:08:53,840 'and especially the tyres, could handle the 135 00:08:53,841 --> 00:08:56,320 vast heat of constant high-speed cornering. 136 00:08:57,960 --> 00:09:01,039 'But as for Richard and his car from Leicester... ' 137 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:04,599 Do Noble not have a workshop here? Not a workshop, no. 138 00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:08,359 I suppose if we were doing this at Mallory Park, they'd send Geoff over 139 00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:11,879 I've done it. It's all right. All four tyres are the same makes. 140 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:15,039 That there's air in 'em. 141 00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:18,919 'James and I were feeling fairly confident... 142 00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:22,599 'until we started chatting to a man called Max Venturi, 143 00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:25,239 'who is one of Lambo's test drivers.' 144 00:09:25,240 --> 00:09:29,359 We do a lot of testing here but we don't do too much the top speed, 145 00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:30,959 because it is very bumpy. 146 00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:35,839 You... you could jump from one lane to the other lane, 147 00:09:35,840 --> 00:09:37,519 so is... That sounds bad. 148 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:40,679 And also, today, it is windy, 149 00:09:40,680 --> 00:09:43,360 so you need to take care about the wind, as well. 150 00:09:43,361 --> 00:09:46,040 What, do we need to tack 151 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:51,279 'Because speedometers are never absolutely accurate, 152 00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:54,919 'the producers fitted each of our cars with hi-tech telemetry 153 00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:57,959 'so they could see how fast we were really going. 154 00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:02,840 'And then we were sent on to the track for a sighting lap.' 155 00:10:10,040 --> 00:10:12,239 I have the most to lose here. 156 00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:16,559 My car is the fastest... top speed 225mph. 157 00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:21,759 Jeremy's Lambo... 217, James's McLaren 205mph, 158 00:10:21,760 --> 00:10:24,919 or to put it another way, a walking race. 159 00:10:24,920 --> 00:10:29,679 Now, I have 691 brake horsepower at my disposal. 160 00:10:29,680 --> 00:10:33,159 That's almost 100 more than James has. 161 00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:35,679 And it's proper horsepower. 162 00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:38,519 Blue-blooded, real horsepower. 163 00:10:38,520 --> 00:10:40,319 Thanks to emission regulations, 164 00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:43,679 this is probably the last V12 engine that will ever be made. 165 00:10:43,680 --> 00:10:46,839 From now on, they'll have to be smaller and turbo charged, 166 00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:50,999 like they are in the Noble and the McLaren. 167 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:54,999 Yes, my engine is the smallest. It's a 3.8-litre V8, 168 00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:59,919 but it has the highest specific output, that is, of all the engines here, 169 00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:01,959 it produces the most BHP per litre, 170 00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:06,119 because it's been intelligently designed by engineers in Woking, 171 00:11:06,120 --> 00:11:09,760 not just put together to impress yahoos. 172 00:11:11,480 --> 00:11:15,599 Those two keep banging on about, "This has got the engine out of a Volvo XC90." 173 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:19,399 Yes, well, OK, but let's not forget, Yamaha make it, 174 00:11:19,400 --> 00:11:23,439 and they produce some pretty amazing motorcycle engines, 175 00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:28,199 and Noble have then strapped two turbos to it, so it makes 650 brake horsepower. 176 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:30,120 I say that, but I can change that. 177 00:11:30,121 --> 00:11:35,279 With this button down here, I can have 450 for road, 550 for track, 178 00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:39,239 or 650 for race. I'm going to have the full 650, I think, today. 179 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:43,239 I do have quite a lot of respect for the Midget doing this, because... 180 00:11:43,240 --> 00:11:48,039 Well, the last time he tried to go fast on a test track, it didn't go well. 181 00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:50,519 With the sighting lap over, 182 00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:55,520 we were told to put some distance between ourselves and go for it. 183 00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:03,520 I'm moving up into the outside lane. 184 00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:10,280 It's 250kph. 185 00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:14,799 Now we're in 6th speed... 186 00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:17,400 Moving up a little bit... 187 00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:22,840 It does feel a bit wobbly. I don't like it. 188 00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:25,160 270... 189 00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:29,399 My God, this surface is shocking! 190 00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:32,519 There's the wind! There's the wobble! 191 00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:34,519 There's the jump! 192 00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:36,279 God! 193 00:12:36,280 --> 00:12:41,039 See, that is 280, and it's really starting to weave now. 290... 194 00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:43,879 'Max from Lamborghini had warned all of us 195 00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:48,479 'that it would be too dangerous to exceed 300km per hour. 196 00:12:48,480 --> 00:12:51,160 'And all of us chose to ignore him.' 197 00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:54,400 My foot is hard down now. 198 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:00,239 300 and... Crikey! Moses. 199 00:13:00,240 --> 00:13:02,560 I'd a lift there. Bit of a panic. 200 00:13:04,520 --> 00:13:09,399 300km per hour indicated. I can feel the car jumping. 201 00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:12,439 Buffeting! Buffeting! 202 00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:15,199 There's a scare? 203 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:18,279 340... 360... 204 00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:22,880 And every fibre of by being wants me to lift off! 205 00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:26,959 God Almighty! 206 00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:29,440 God knows what those tyres are going through. 207 00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:33,679 God, it's hypnotic. 208 00:13:33,680 --> 00:13:36,120 Don't look at the line, don't look at the line. 209 00:13:37,680 --> 00:13:40,559 Come on! 210 00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:42,399 Please, just another ten! 211 00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:44,599 326 indicated! 212 00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:46,200 327 indicated. 213 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:51,599 329 indicated! Come on... 330! 214 00:13:51,600 --> 00:13:52,959 331. 215 00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:56,759 Come on, give me a bit more than 330! 216 00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:58,279 Just give me a bit more! 217 00:13:58,280 --> 00:13:59,679 A bit more! 218 00:13:59,680 --> 00:14:02,399 This is BLEEP quick! 219 00:14:10,480 --> 00:14:13,520 I'm backing out of this. 220 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:16,319 That is... 221 00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:21,880 Pretty bloody alarming. 222 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:27,359 'With the test over, it was now time to find out which one of us 223 00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:30,159 'had the biggest testes.' 224 00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:33,119 The top speed of your car is 225mph. Yes. 225 00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:37,879 You achieved 204.8. 226 00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:42,639 Who have you got? I've got James's. James's? Yes. 227 00:14:42,640 --> 00:14:46,839 In the slowest car, in the slowest car. 200... 228 00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:48,920 And 1.6. 229 00:14:50,240 --> 00:14:53,759 217mph IS the top speed of the Lamborghini. 230 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,359 You did it at 231 00:14:55,360 --> 00:15:01,239 204.3. God. 232 00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:03,879 No! Yes! 233 00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:05,200 No! 234 00:15:16,360 --> 00:15:19,759 Right, we will, of course be picking that up again later on. 235 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:22,100 Can I just say, half a mile an hour? 236 00:15:22,101 --> 00:15:24,439 That's all there was in it between you and me. Yeah. 237 00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:29,839 If I'd just kept my foot down... Yeah. But you lost! 238 00:15:29,840 --> 00:15:32,680 Hold on a minute. Hold on. I think you'll find 239 00:15:32,681 --> 00:15:35,519 you both lost. How did you work that out? 240 00:15:35,520 --> 00:15:39,239 Because I got closest to the theoretical top speed of my car, 241 00:15:39,240 --> 00:15:42,599 and therefore I have the biggest testes. No! 242 00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:46,039 The challenge was to see who could drive the fastest, and I did. 243 00:15:46,040 --> 00:15:48,220 Then we refilled the cars, we brimmed them, to 244 00:15:48,221 --> 00:15:50,399 see which had used the least fuel doing it, 245 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:54,599 and guess what?! Well, the Lambo did 7mpg, 246 00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:58,439 the McLaren did 8mpg and the Noble did 9! 247 00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:01,039 So the Noble wins AGAIN! I know! 248 00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:03,759 Just stop it! Let's just... No, no, no. OK. 249 00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:09,439 Let's just... just to work out where we are, so that's two challenges so far, 250 00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:13,039 two wins for the Noble, and for the Lambo... 251 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:17,559 Now, let's see. Let's not see. Let's do the news. All right. 252 00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:20,719 Actually, before that, those of you who saw our Christmas special 253 00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:24,239 will remember we left our three cars on plinths high in the Himalayas 254 00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:27,319 on a road between China and India, 255 00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:31,879 so that people passing between these two great economic superpowers 256 00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,879 would forevermore be reminded of Great Britain. 257 00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:36,519 Well, unfortunately, 258 00:16:36,520 --> 00:16:40,999 it turns out that the plinths were built on 259 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,039 an ancient burial ground 260 00:16:43,040 --> 00:16:45,119 with deep religious significance, 261 00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:48,479 so a man came and told us to take them down immediately. 262 00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:50,879 Yeah. So we did. Where are the cars now? 263 00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:54,599 They're not in the Himalayas. But where are they? 264 00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:59,639 Hampshire. Really? Yes. That's where it is. Anyway, the news. 265 00:16:59,640 --> 00:17:03,320 There was a man in the papers this week who 266 00:17:03,321 --> 00:17:06,999 has failed his driving theory test 92 times. 267 00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:13,079 92?! I don't want to be rude, but he must be an idiot... 268 00:17:13,080 --> 00:17:16,220 I mean, 92... Interestingly, you say that. 269 00:17:16,221 --> 00:17:19,359 Have you seen the theory test? I didn't have to do one. 270 00:17:19,360 --> 00:17:23,719 Has anyone here seen the theory test? Anybody? Yeah. You have? 271 00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:26,039 Because most people of our age haven't, 272 00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:28,060 and none of the questions have anything to do... 273 00:17:28,061 --> 00:17:30,079 as far as I can work out... with driving. 274 00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:32,799 Can I give you some examples? You can answer this. 275 00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:35,399 "An elderly person... 276 00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:38,440 "An elderly person's ability could be 277 00:17:38,441 --> 00:17:41,479 affected because they may be unable to...?" 278 00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:43,639 Eat toffees. No. 279 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:45,879 Get an erection. 280 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,479 Wear jeans! 281 00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:54,199 Funny "Where's the safest place to park your vehicle at night?" 282 00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:56,279 In a police station. 283 00:17:56,280 --> 00:18:01,359 Right, we've got a picture here. Bring up this picture. Right. 284 00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:03,399 This is a real question, OK? 285 00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:06,319 "You must not stop on these road markings 286 00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:08,880 "because you may obstruct... what?" 287 00:18:10,360 --> 00:18:14,119 Landing aircraft I mean, seriously, that is a question. 288 00:18:14,120 --> 00:18:16,560 He's managed to fail 92 times on that one. 289 00:18:16,561 --> 00:18:18,999 Those are not questions to pass your driving... 290 00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:21,959 Do any of them say, for instance, can you drive a car No, no. 291 00:18:21,960 --> 00:18:24,760 I'm in the book now. This is what you buy your 292 00:18:24,761 --> 00:18:27,559 teenage child when they're learning to drive. 293 00:18:27,560 --> 00:18:31,999 "At an incident, a small child is not breathing. 294 00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:34,300 "To restore normal breathing, you should 295 00:18:34,301 --> 00:18:36,599 breathe into their mouth, A sharply, B gently, 296 00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:38,959 "C heavily, D tenderly?" 297 00:18:38,960 --> 00:18:40,679 It doesn't say "tenderly"! 298 00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:42,920 I made "tenderly" up. Nothing to do with driving! 299 00:18:42,921 --> 00:18:45,159 That's enough driving test rubbish. 300 00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:47,719 We'll have to move it on, or we'll be here all day. 301 00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:50,839 Let's talk about cars again, because the mighty Alfa Romeo, 302 00:18:50,840 --> 00:18:53,399 they are reduced now, to a full range of cars, 303 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:57,439 they make two. Two cars. Really? What, the Mito and... 304 00:18:57,440 --> 00:18:59,760 The Giulietta and the Mito. They don't make the 159 any more? 305 00:18:59,761 --> 00:19:02,079 No, two Alfa Romeos on the market, 306 00:19:02,080 --> 00:19:05,479 but that's about to change as they have just announced this, the 4C. 307 00:19:05,480 --> 00:19:09,159 I know. It's tiny, it's a small, lightweight sports car. 308 00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:12,159 Very lightweight. Carbon fibre, all sorts of clever technical stuff. 309 00:19:12,160 --> 00:19:15,479 Mid...engined... it's only a 1750CC engine, but it's turbo charged, 310 00:19:15,480 --> 00:19:19,079 so it will be quick, because it's so light. It looks fantastic! 311 00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:22,079 It's wrong, is what it is. What Alfa Romeo should make 312 00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:24,479 is a small convertible two-seater, 313 00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:27,119 engine at the front, rear-wheel drive. 314 00:19:27,120 --> 00:19:30,599 They could call it, I don't know, the... Spider? Spider's a great name. 315 00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:34,439 And maybe they could get Dustin Hoffman to appear in a film with it, 316 00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:36,500 to etch it into the world's consciousness. 317 00:19:36,501 --> 00:19:38,559 They could, they could live in the past. 318 00:19:38,560 --> 00:19:42,879 Or they could make something modern and forward-looking, like that. No, rubbish! 319 00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:44,860 What if you two had been at Alfa Romeo when 320 00:19:44,861 --> 00:19:46,839 they came up with the original Spider? 321 00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:49,479 "That's no good! Where's the horse in front of it? 322 00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:53,319 "It's not wood. That'll never work." It's not modern. It won't work. 323 00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:56,759 Make it go away. I've got something more important to talk about. 324 00:19:56,760 --> 00:20:01,999 - A new Maserati. Really OK. - This is the new Maserati 4x4, OK? 325 00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:06,039 I think it looks fantastic but there are some odd things about it. 326 00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:12,199 Maserati say that, unlike any other big 4x4, it has a luxury atmosphere. 327 00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:15,319 Cos every time I get in a Range Rover, I always think, "No! 328 00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:17,999 "I've accidentally got into a cowshed." 329 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:19,759 And then they say, 330 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:23,319 "There are no off-roaders that give a sporty feel." 331 00:20:23,320 --> 00:20:27,919 What about the Porsche Cayenne? Or the Mercedes ML63? BMW X5? 332 00:20:27,920 --> 00:20:29,919 All of those? 333 00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:32,360 I think Maserati... they're the sort of company 334 00:20:32,361 --> 00:20:34,799 that go, "We've invented a new type of watch. 335 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:38,919 "What makes it really good is, you can wear it on your wrist!" 336 00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:41,460 This is quite awkward, because somebody'll have 337 00:20:41,461 --> 00:20:43,999 to tell them, "Hey, Maserati, it's been done!" 338 00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:46,940 What I love about this, though, is it's 339 00:20:46,941 --> 00:20:49,879 called the Kubang, which, being a Maserati, 340 00:20:49,880 --> 00:20:53,519 is the noise it'll make the day the warranty runs out! 341 00:20:53,520 --> 00:20:56,560 We received a press release from someone who wanted to 342 00:20:56,561 --> 00:20:59,599 get their name on the television, I've always said. 343 00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:02,600 Now, they say that the standard of your driving 344 00:21:02,601 --> 00:21:05,599 gets worse if you're suffering from a cold. 345 00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:11,759 The thing is, they go on to say that it's no good taking a cold remedy, 346 00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:15,100 because the police say that's the same as driving 347 00:21:15,101 --> 00:21:18,439 while under the influence of cocaine. Is it?! 348 00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:21,879 Sorry, I mean... It's cheaper, though. It isn't, is it? 349 00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:26,039 I mean, cocaine and Day Nurse are different products entirely. 350 00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:29,359 They're in a different price bracket. Entirely different. 351 00:21:29,360 --> 00:21:32,600 I bring all this up, OK, because when did it 352 00:21:32,601 --> 00:21:35,839 happen that somebody decided that driving 353 00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:40,359 was so unbelievably hard, you can't do it while doing something else? 354 00:21:40,360 --> 00:21:43,759 Like listening to Ken Bruce's pop master, or talking on the phone. 355 00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:47,759 Honestly, I can't think of anything that I couldn't do while driving... 356 00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,199 apart from reading a broadsheet newspaper. 357 00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:52,799 I wouldn't be able to do that. Sawing a piece of wood. 358 00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:55,439 I could do that. You'd... No, no, you put it between your legs. 359 00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:58,700 You can still operate the pedals. You could saw. 360 00:21:58,701 --> 00:22:01,959 It's like sewing on a button. You need both hands... 361 00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:03,959 I could do that. You could not! I could! 362 00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:07,919 You know you can't sew on a button with a hammer? I know how to sew. 363 00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:11,439 While we're on the subject, did you see that case recently... 364 00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:14,100 a woman who was stopped by the police after they 365 00:22:14,101 --> 00:22:16,759 caught her driving down a motorway while... 366 00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:20,080 causing herself to have pleasure. 367 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:25,279 I bet you can't drive in a sleeping bag. 368 00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:27,599 Actually, I'm not sure. 369 00:22:27,600 --> 00:22:29,920 I'm going to take that back. I think you could drive in a sleeping bag. 370 00:22:29,921 --> 00:22:33,759 You couldn't drive in a sleeping bag. I bet I could. Can't! 371 00:22:33,760 --> 00:22:37,479 I bet I could drive in a sleeping bag. Right, you're on! 372 00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:41,759 Some time this week, before next week's show, I'll take you on round the track. 373 00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:45,460 You drive in a proper cocoon sleeping bag... Yeah... 374 00:22:45,461 --> 00:22:49,159 and race me, and I'll sew a button on my shirt. 375 00:22:49,160 --> 00:22:53,039 Let me guess... I've got to drive whilst performing an act on myself. 376 00:22:58,440 --> 00:23:02,879 No. It'd be a short race! We'll leave you out of it. 377 00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:05,519 Can we make it a 50-yard sprint?! 378 00:23:05,520 --> 00:23:10,039 Right, that is the end of the news, so let's get back to the action. 379 00:23:10,040 --> 00:23:13,159 Tonight, for those of you with very short memories, 380 00:23:13,160 --> 00:23:16,879 we are trying to answer an important question... 381 00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:21,079 which is the best mid-engined supercar if you don't want a Ferrari 458? 382 00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:23,559 James says it's the McLaren MP4...12C. 383 00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:26,599 I say it's the Lamborghini Aventador, 384 00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:29,719 and Richard says it's the Noble M600. 385 00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:32,399 Yes, and so far, I'm being proved right. 386 00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:35,719 It achieved the highest top speed and is the most economical. 387 00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:38,159 But having tested those sort of things, 388 00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:42,159 we were then told to leave the test track and drive north to Rome. 389 00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:45,959 So, three supercars, lovely weather, drive across Italy, 390 00:23:45,960 --> 00:23:48,440 what could possibly go wrong 391 00:23:51,360 --> 00:23:55,999 'Certainly, as the day began, the rather smug Hammond was very happy, 392 00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:57,879 'making up his own little games.' 393 00:23:57,880 --> 00:24:01,719 I'm going to make some more turbo noise. It is addictive. 394 00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:05,880 Put the foot down and then lift off. 395 00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:10,559 Turbo noises are sort of for children. You do know that? 396 00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:13,180 Right, I'm going to come alongside and give 397 00:24:13,181 --> 00:24:15,799 you a turbo noise. Drop your window. God... 398 00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:19,280 Three, two, one. 399 00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:27,560 This is like indulging a six-year-old child who's learned a simple card trick. 400 00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:32,400 BLEEP! 401 00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:42,159 I hate to say this, but I believe I have clutch or gearbox issues. 402 00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:44,000 Dear. 403 00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:48,100 I can't understand it myself, cos you know 404 00:24:48,101 --> 00:24:50,359 when you see the legend "made in Leicester"... 405 00:24:50,360 --> 00:24:53,919 It's a byword for reliability and quality. Absolutely. 406 00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:56,839 So what are the other things that are made in Leicester? 407 00:24:56,840 --> 00:25:00,200 Leicestershire cheese? They make pork pies nearby, don't they? 408 00:25:00,201 --> 00:25:03,559 Yeah. Pork pies are always reliable 409 00:25:03,560 --> 00:25:06,000 Have you tried pumping the clutch, to see if...? 410 00:25:06,001 --> 00:25:08,439 Well, no, because the linkage is to cock as well. 411 00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:11,759 'Clearly, the Noble wasn't going anywhere.' 412 00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:14,119 Let me just think a minute. Sorry. 413 00:25:14,120 --> 00:25:16,839 When something goes wrong with my car, 414 00:25:16,840 --> 00:25:19,359 Richard Hammond always... helps you. 415 00:25:19,360 --> 00:25:22,919 No, the opposite of that. No, he just gets in his car and drives off. 416 00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:26,280 You're right. Yes. Let's do that. Goodbye. Goodbye. 417 00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:31,839 'We were leaving Hammond 200 miles away from Rome, 418 00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:35,159 'and that made us feel quite sorry for him.' 419 00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:40,519 For two months, he's been looking forward to driving his Noble 420 00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:43,400 right across Italy, and he's only gone 30 miles! 421 00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:52,320 'As our cars ate up the miles, we got to know them better.' 422 00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:57,079 Bloody hell, it's good, this. It really is good. 423 00:25:57,080 --> 00:26:00,279 It's very clever. It's active, this car. 424 00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:03,519 It doesn't have big metal anti-roll bars, or anything like that. 425 00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:07,759 Everything is controlled by its brain. It works out what each wheel is doing. 426 00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:10,639 It can even brake an individual wheel as you corner. 427 00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:15,399 In the olden days, supercars were very, very hard to drive, 428 00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:18,679 and the hardest of them all were the big Lambos. 429 00:26:18,680 --> 00:26:23,559 Changing gear in a Countach or a Diablo, you needed two hands. 430 00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:27,399 This, though, it feels like a Golf. I mean, I'm doing, what, 431 00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:31,999 80mph now, and it's almost completely silent. 432 00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:34,959 I can see where I'm going. I can see roughly where I've been. 433 00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:38,319 I think it's important to stress at this point, 434 00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:41,119 every single thing about this car is new. 435 00:26:41,120 --> 00:26:45,000 Body, interior, engine, suspension. Everything. 436 00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:48,680 It's brand new, and it feels it. 437 00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:53,999 'Meanwhile, after a two-and-a-half-hour wait, 438 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:57,440 'my knight in shining armour finally arrived.' 439 00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:09,479 Hi! 440 00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:14,759 Hi... 441 00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:16,839 This is the car. 442 00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:18,679 Yeah! 443 00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:20,200 Please talk to me. 444 00:27:21,560 --> 00:27:25,960 Please just say hello, or just... Or see me, even. 445 00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:31,559 Now, there's a big tunnel coming up here. 446 00:27:31,560 --> 00:27:33,680 The irresponsible thing to do would be to 447 00:27:33,681 --> 00:27:35,799 turn the power train into the track mode 448 00:27:35,800 --> 00:27:41,319 and change down unnecessarily. Three, two, one, go! 449 00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:48,080 What a sound! 450 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:59,720 'James's car made a great noise, but mine was making fire!' 451 00:28:05,720 --> 00:28:07,680 Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! 452 00:28:10,960 --> 00:28:14,040 It's a shame Hammond isn't here to enjoy the moment. 453 00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:20,920 Right... 454 00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:25,280 Does he need that many words? 455 00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:29,280 God. 456 00:28:33,720 --> 00:28:37,279 The thing coming off the bottom of his phone is actually a wire... 457 00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:40,040 into his jacket, and then that's ALL batteries. 458 00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:52,119 Yeah! 459 00:28:55,320 --> 00:28:56,840 Right... 460 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:09,159 Back to six! 461 00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:13,559 'Our day, meanwhile, was just getting better and better.' 462 00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:21,880 That's not a bad view, is it? Marvellous. 463 00:29:23,280 --> 00:29:27,119 It's just suddenly hit me, that I'm driving across Italy in a supercar, 464 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:30,120 and I've got another one to look at! 465 00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:40,920 Buonasera! Buonasera! 466 00:29:43,120 --> 00:29:46,279 Yeah... No idea. 467 00:29:46,280 --> 00:29:48,919 Parlate Italiano? No. 468 00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:51,999 Inglese? No! French? No. 469 00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:56,879 No, he's going on the phone. No. No... 470 00:29:56,880 --> 00:30:00,239 Well, that's that, then. 471 00:30:00,240 --> 00:30:02,479 'Still, could be worse... ' 472 00:30:06,440 --> 00:30:08,280 Dear. 473 00:30:10,880 --> 00:30:12,639 Prepare to look at shoes. 474 00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:17,040 This is my special face, reserved for continental policemen. 475 00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:30,600 OK? OK! Yeah. 476 00:30:33,480 --> 00:30:38,599 Still, it is under four hours to Rome. Just. 477 00:30:44,600 --> 00:30:48,719 The only problem for them is because today is holiday in Italy. 478 00:30:48,720 --> 00:30:51,180 Interestingly, their only real concern is 479 00:30:51,181 --> 00:30:53,639 that we appear to be working on a Sunday. 480 00:30:53,640 --> 00:30:55,719 We need a permit for that. 481 00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:58,240 That's why Italy's nearly bankrupt. 482 00:30:59,680 --> 00:31:02,599 'Eventually, they told us we had to stop working, 483 00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:05,840 'so we went into Rome for a lovely dinner.' 484 00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:14,840 Somebody's farted. 485 00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:21,919 'The next day, in a workshop in the outskirts of Rome, 486 00:31:21,920 --> 00:31:25,399 'I found out just what had gone wrong with my Noble.' 487 00:31:25,400 --> 00:31:32,479 This is the clutch assembly... and this is the plate and, yeah, 488 00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:35,359 that's pretty clearly the component that failed. 489 00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:38,559 Once that broke, that came away, which is not supposed to happen. 490 00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:42,359 The thing is, this is easily replaceable. Noble don't make these. 491 00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:45,279 They're bought in... it's a clutch... but the problem now is, 492 00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:48,399 because that was whizzing around inside here, 493 00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:50,820 that's damaged bearings and shafts and all sorts of things. 494 00:31:50,821 --> 00:31:53,240 What's it done to the gearbox? 495 00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:59,239 'James and I decided the best way we could help Hammond was to go for lunch, 496 00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:03,359 'and since it was a Monday and we were allowed to do a bit of work, 497 00:32:03,360 --> 00:32:05,780 'we thought we'd find out which of our cars was 498 00:32:05,781 --> 00:32:08,199 best in traffic by racing to the restaurant. 499 00:32:08,200 --> 00:32:11,399 'Last one there would pay the bill!' 500 00:32:11,400 --> 00:32:14,080 Right, let the race begin. 501 00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:21,239 'Immediately, it was advantage Lambo, because the Aventador has satnav... ' 502 00:32:21,240 --> 00:32:24,479 'Your route is being calculated.' Thank you. 503 00:32:24,480 --> 00:32:28,280 '..Whereas, on the McLaren, it's an option... that hadn't been fitted.' 504 00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:34,759 Bollocks! 505 00:32:34,760 --> 00:32:37,199 I'll come back to that. 506 00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:39,359 'However, I did have some issues.' 507 00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:42,279 The first problem is width. 508 00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:45,679 It's five centimetres wider than a Range Rover. 509 00:32:45,680 --> 00:32:50,279 It's very nearly as wide, in fact, as a London bus, 510 00:32:50,280 --> 00:32:54,999 but the biggest problem of them all is the gearbox. 511 00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:57,559 Flappy paddle boxes were OK on a track, 512 00:32:57,560 --> 00:33:00,439 they work OK on the open road, but in town, 513 00:33:00,440 --> 00:33:03,159 all of them are useless. 514 00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:05,959 It's uh-uh-uh-uh-uh, jerking along, and then, 515 00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:09,599 when you want to exploit a gap, it's dim-witted and slow. 516 00:33:09,600 --> 00:33:15,639 'This was especially bad in a city where there are 117 road accidents every DAY.' 517 00:33:15,640 --> 00:33:19,919 Haven't actually seen one car yet that isn't dented. 518 00:33:19,920 --> 00:33:21,759 Look at that one there. 519 00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:26,439 A red light, but that actually doesn't mean stop. Not in Italy. 520 00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:30,119 It means, "We're trying a red light. In a minute, we'll try a green one." 521 00:33:30,120 --> 00:33:33,120 It's not relevant to the actual traffic flow. 522 00:33:37,280 --> 00:33:40,519 What happened to that?! Dear. 523 00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:44,639 What we're now going to do, and this is quite cool, really, 524 00:33:44,640 --> 00:33:48,959 is turn onto the Via Appia, the ancient Roman road, 525 00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:51,980 and the suspension, with its no anti-roll bars and 526 00:33:51,981 --> 00:33:54,999 its intelligent computer, is doing quite well. 527 00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:56,919 Excellently, in fact. 528 00:33:56,920 --> 00:34:01,920 Why is nobody using that middle bit? Yes! That's the ticket! 529 00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:08,800 Now, you see, I didn't actually think it would get quite THAT Roman. 530 00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:18,240 I'm going to by overtaken by a Smart car! 531 00:34:19,560 --> 00:34:23,759 'By this stage, I'd worked out why no-one was using the middle bit. ' 532 00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:28,440 I've got myself on a railway line. 533 00:34:29,680 --> 00:34:32,079 Now what am I going to do? 534 00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:37,119 Sorry. Yeah, now I'm basically going down a... Yes. 535 00:34:37,120 --> 00:34:39,999 I'm now driving down a railway embankment... 536 00:34:41,800 --> 00:34:45,600 Ristorante Nino, Via Appia... 537 00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:53,400 Yeah, the ground clearance is very poor. OK. 538 00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:59,679 'Soon, though, after a short drive through a bit of history... ' 539 00:34:59,680 --> 00:35:02,119 No! God Al-bloody-mighty! 540 00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:05,399 '..We were both near our destination.' 541 00:35:05,400 --> 00:35:07,799 I'm so close. 542 00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:09,360 BLEEP! 543 00:35:12,120 --> 00:35:17,559 Now, the restaurant is coming up in 30 metres. There it is. 544 00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:20,599 'All I had to do now was park.' 545 00:35:20,600 --> 00:35:23,020 That's Veneto. It's too wide. You see, if I 546 00:35:23,021 --> 00:35:25,439 park there, I just block the whole street. 547 00:35:25,440 --> 00:35:28,840 God. No, you're joking. 548 00:35:29,880 --> 00:35:31,199 No-o-o! 549 00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:33,359 How do you park a Lamborghini here? 550 00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:40,759 Is that the piazza? I think it is. I'm right on top of it. 551 00:35:40,760 --> 00:35:43,719 Via Vittorio. It's correct! 552 00:35:43,720 --> 00:35:45,840 Right, parking space. 553 00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:50,519 Hell's... BLEEP .. bum... BLEEP ..arseholes. 554 00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:52,679 Parking, parking, parking, parking. 555 00:35:52,680 --> 00:35:55,719 It's the easiest thing in the world, reversing a Lambo. 556 00:35:55,720 --> 00:35:58,760 You just get out of the car to do it. 557 00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:03,399 Can I go there? Why can't I go there? There's no lines. 558 00:36:03,400 --> 00:36:06,400 James May, get ready to lose. 559 00:36:10,720 --> 00:36:16,040 Prego? Prego. Have you seen a very long-haired man? An idiot? Here. 560 00:36:22,315 --> 00:36:26,194 'After lunch, which I didn't bother with, because I was paying, 561 00:36:26,323 --> 00:36:29,999 'we decided to help Richard some more by going shopping. 562 00:36:30,000 --> 00:36:33,799 'And then, we got a bit of a surprise.' That's Hammond. 563 00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:35,119 No, but it's not... 564 00:36:40,958 --> 00:36:44,511 That's a different car. No, no. This is still wet. 565 00:36:44,558 --> 00:36:46,495 Don't lean on it. I painted it. 566 00:36:46,531 --> 00:36:48,870 Maybe you thought, "I'll put the steering wheel on this side" 567 00:36:49,644 --> 00:36:52,404 It's always been on that side. You were looking at 568 00:36:52,561 --> 00:36:55,319 me in your rear-view mirror. You have changed cars. 569 00:36:55,320 --> 00:36:56,880 Hammond? What? 570 00:36:58,160 --> 00:37:01,519 You're joking! Come on! 571 00:37:01,520 --> 00:37:03,519 This isn't my car. Mine's red. 572 00:37:03,957 --> 00:37:06,651 You haven't caused a stir. Buongiorno. 573 00:37:06,815 --> 00:37:08,735 I think people have come to see... 574 00:37:11,560 --> 00:37:13,639 Did that first delivery driver... 575 00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:16,039 Did that first repair man not say anything? No. 576 00:37:16,040 --> 00:37:19,839 I don't think he could see me. "Hello! I'm here." No, nothing. 577 00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:24,439 Anyway, can we just ask... how did a tiny little company like Noble 578 00:37:24,440 --> 00:37:27,500 get another car out there so quickly? I'm being serious. 579 00:37:27,501 --> 00:37:31,175 Be serious. Seriously, they drove it. 580 00:37:31,510 --> 00:37:33,753 A bloke drove it from the factory, overnight, 581 00:37:33,816 --> 00:37:36,575 all the way from Leicester to Rome in one hit. 582 00:37:36,667 --> 00:37:38,320 That's what I call service. "Certainly, sir. 583 00:37:38,321 --> 00:37:40,359 We'll send you another car." 584 00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:44,378 But it is Noble... you mean, "We'll send you THE other car"? Yeah. 585 00:37:44,440 --> 00:37:46,987 Anyway, we'll pick that up later on. Now, though, it 586 00:37:47,010 --> 00:37:50,503 is time to put a star in our reasonably priced car. 587 00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:56,347 Let me list some songs. I'm Not In Love, Wichita Lineman, Lady In Red. 588 00:37:56,495 --> 00:37:59,815 My guest tonight hasn't recorded any of those. 589 00:37:59,895 --> 00:38:04,814 That's because he's from an organisation called the Black Eyed Peas. 590 00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:09,831 Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome will.i.am. 591 00:38:14,675 --> 00:38:18,635 How are you? Good to see you. Good to see you. 592 00:38:27,089 --> 00:38:29,758 Your e-mail address must be a nightmare! 593 00:38:29,759 --> 00:38:38,112 will.i.am.@.a.o.l. 594 00:38:38,124 --> 00:38:39,429 .uk. 595 00:38:41,160 --> 00:38:44,315 I have never met anybody in my entire life 596 00:38:44,370 --> 00:38:46,534 who is apparently as busy as you are, 597 00:38:46,589 --> 00:38:48,839 because you're a fashion designer, 598 00:38:48,840 --> 00:38:54,039 you've worked for Obama, starred in X-Men Origins and Madagascar, 599 00:38:54,040 --> 00:38:57,359 you run a scholarship fund for disadvantaged youngsters, 600 00:38:57,360 --> 00:39:01,759 you're a creative director at Intel, you developed smartphones, 601 00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:05,253 produce everyone in the world, make your own music, 602 00:39:05,319 --> 00:39:10,014 * 603 00:39:10,065 --> 00:39:13,736 and you've started a car company. Yeah. What is it? 604 00:39:13,790 --> 00:39:15,001 Tell us about it. 605 00:39:15,037 --> 00:39:19,728 So, when I was working at Intel, I found out that a lot of the phones 606 00:39:19,775 --> 00:39:21,189 and the things that you have 607 00:39:21,190 --> 00:39:24,709 aren't really made by the name that's on the phone, 608 00:39:24,710 --> 00:39:28,290 so there's all these companies in Southeast Asia that 609 00:39:28,291 --> 00:39:31,345 make all the equipment. You mean the components? 610 00:39:31,400 --> 00:39:36,056 Yeah. Then you put them together, like a sandwich, and then you got your product. 611 00:39:36,118 --> 00:39:37,720 Then I got into my car... 612 00:39:37,830 --> 00:39:41,814 I want to know how much it cost to make this Bentley that I'm driving. 613 00:39:41,884 --> 00:39:44,949 A Bentley? Yeah. About 38 pence! 614 00:39:44,950 --> 00:39:50,269 Right. Cos it's just a Volkswagen with some wood on the dashboard. 615 00:39:50,270 --> 00:39:52,210 So, for the past two years, we've been tooling... 616 00:39:52,211 --> 00:39:54,149 I design things on my computer. 617 00:39:54,150 --> 00:39:56,589 The first thing I did was a Thundervet, 618 00:39:56,590 --> 00:39:58,830 where you take a Thunderbird and a vet... 619 00:39:58,831 --> 00:40:01,069 We've got a photograph of it. 620 00:40:01,070 --> 00:40:04,949 Yeah, that's a Thundervet. Cos that looks like a '50s vet. 621 00:40:04,950 --> 00:40:07,090 The white slash is '50s vet, but there's 622 00:40:07,091 --> 00:40:09,229 some Thunderbird in there, as well? Yeah. 623 00:40:09,230 --> 00:40:13,876 So, the groove and stuff. And those wheels aren't white-wall tyres. 624 00:40:14,063 --> 00:40:17,790 That's a white-wall rim, with the five-spoke inside of it. 625 00:40:17,910 --> 00:40:19,709 That's the actual rim? 626 00:40:19,710 --> 00:40:23,389 Yeah. That's fantastic. So, what engine has it got? 627 00:40:23,390 --> 00:40:26,269 That has a super-sized Corvette engine in it. 628 00:40:26,270 --> 00:40:29,103 And have you designed your own car now, with its own body? 629 00:40:29,165 --> 00:40:31,337 Yes. So, that was just, you know, 630 00:40:31,392 --> 00:40:33,469 let's test what we can do with this. 631 00:40:33,470 --> 00:40:36,789 From there, we go on to something that we built from scratch. 632 00:40:36,790 --> 00:40:41,309 I think we've got a picture of it, as well. IAMAUTO 88. That is... 633 00:40:41,310 --> 00:40:44,909 It's a bit like an old Maserati Quattroporte, except it's two-door. 634 00:40:44,910 --> 00:40:48,690 And that's made in California? That's made down 635 00:40:48,691 --> 00:40:51,665 in the ghetto that I'm from. Why...? Really? 636 00:40:51,767 --> 00:40:55,486 Yeah. My whole thing was, "I'm going to make music so I can take care of my mom, 637 00:40:55,658 --> 00:40:58,030 "and move my family out the ghetto." 638 00:40:58,031 --> 00:41:01,572 So, if that's what I want to do, then it's going to keep me going, 639 00:41:01,634 --> 00:41:03,556 so there's no "no" for an answer. 640 00:41:03,599 --> 00:41:07,212 So, now that I've done that, and every single person in my family... 641 00:41:07,321 --> 00:41:10,440 cousins, uncles, nieces and nephews... are out the ghetto, 642 00:41:11,814 --> 00:41:15,589 I want to go back to my ghetto and build a car company. 643 00:41:15,590 --> 00:41:19,029 We all complain about underdeveloped communities, 644 00:41:19,030 --> 00:41:22,149 but who are the developers in the first place? 645 00:41:22,150 --> 00:41:25,220 So, I was like, "I'm tired of complaining and pointing fingers. 646 00:41:25,271 --> 00:41:29,439 "Why don't I aim that finger to me and say, 647 00:41:29,447 --> 00:41:32,509 " 'Hey, what are you doing to change the ghetto you're from?'" 648 00:41:33,096 --> 00:41:35,476 Do you know, you're one of the most inspiring 649 00:41:35,509 --> 00:41:37,618 people we've ever had sitting in that sofa. 650 00:41:37,743 --> 00:41:39,429 He is, though, isn't he? 651 00:41:41,910 --> 00:41:46,269 If everybody thought like that, we'd have 1.65% growth as well! 652 00:41:46,270 --> 00:41:48,670 Can we just go into your car history? 653 00:41:48,671 --> 00:41:51,069 Where did it begin? What was your first car? 654 00:41:51,070 --> 00:41:55,978 So, I got a record deal when I was 17 and I bought myself... 655 00:41:56,095 --> 00:42:01,220 cos I always wanted a Ferrari or a DeLorean. 656 00:42:01,298 --> 00:42:04,939 Those were my favourite cars. I couldn't afford those, 657 00:42:04,970 --> 00:42:07,993 so I got the poor man's Ferrari, which is a Fiero. 658 00:42:08,317 --> 00:42:13,462 Yeah, that's really poor. That's even the poor man's MR2. 659 00:42:13,603 --> 00:42:14,927 I had a yellow one. 660 00:42:15,030 --> 00:42:18,353 Mid-engine, so it was kind of like a Ferrari 661 00:42:18,400 --> 00:42:22,029 if you were standing five miles away and squinting! 662 00:42:22,947 --> 00:42:26,909 And then my next-door neighbour Pearleen snitched. 663 00:42:26,910 --> 00:42:31,389 She told my mom, "Debra, Willy got himself a new car." 664 00:42:32,678 --> 00:42:35,650 And then my mom calls me in the house. 665 00:42:35,706 --> 00:42:37,533 "Boy, sit your butt down on this couch." 666 00:42:37,658 --> 00:42:40,947 "What, Momma? " "You got no business buying 667 00:42:40,991 --> 00:42:43,829 yourself no G-damn car. " "Yeah, but..." 668 00:42:43,830 --> 00:42:47,229 "No but nothing. Gimme them damn keys." 669 00:42:47,230 --> 00:42:51,389 So she confiscated my car. 670 00:42:51,390 --> 00:42:54,989 So then I couldn't drive until I was 20. 671 00:42:55,012 --> 00:42:59,548 So it just sat there? A 2,000...Car. For three years? 672 00:42:59,605 --> 00:43:01,236 For three years it sat there. 673 00:43:01,285 --> 00:43:03,883 I couldn't wait till I was 20, then I could drive it. 674 00:43:03,907 --> 00:43:07,861 Black Eyed Peas... how many records have you sold? Millions. 675 00:43:08,150 --> 00:43:11,728 To date, 40 something million records. 40 million? 676 00:43:11,798 --> 00:43:14,109 It is massive. And you've got... 677 00:43:14,110 --> 00:43:17,150 Yeah! 40 million. 678 00:43:19,590 --> 00:43:22,095 And you've now got a solo album out. 679 00:43:22,197 --> 00:43:28,017 And it's called Squiggle Squiggle #willpower. 680 00:43:28,329 --> 00:43:32,181 No, it's just #willpower. #willpower. 681 00:43:32,264 --> 00:43:34,915 There are squiggles. It's a hash! 682 00:43:35,150 --> 00:43:39,269 I just thought it was like a misprint. No, no. 683 00:43:39,270 --> 00:43:45,470 Have you ever been interviewed by somebody more old than me? No... 684 00:43:47,230 --> 00:43:50,069 Now, you came down here, obviously... well, 685 00:43:50,070 --> 00:43:55,749 looking at your gloves, to play golf, but, it isn't a Golf. 686 00:43:55,750 --> 00:43:59,229 No, no. The reason I have fingerless gloves is 687 00:43:59,230 --> 00:44:02,389 because I got touchscreen technology devices, 688 00:44:02,390 --> 00:44:06,309 so last thing you want is, in the cold, I have to go, "My phone is ringing..." 689 00:44:06,310 --> 00:44:08,550 No, cos you can buy gloves that have got 690 00:44:08,551 --> 00:44:10,789 fingerprint things, so wearing... I've got a pair. 691 00:44:10,790 --> 00:44:12,749 They're not fashion. 692 00:44:12,750 --> 00:44:17,069 There you go! They're the ugliest gloves in the world. 693 00:44:17,577 --> 00:44:20,096 They look pretty poor, I admit. 694 00:44:21,501 --> 00:44:23,932 You insisted, I believe, in driving the 695 00:44:23,986 --> 00:44:26,439 automatic car, rather than the stick-shift. 696 00:44:26,509 --> 00:44:29,149 Yeah. So, how did it go out there? 697 00:44:29,150 --> 00:44:33,189 I think I did pretty good, if you judge me on spinning. 698 00:44:34,181 --> 00:44:38,389 Well, now, who would like to see some of Will's spins? 699 00:44:38,390 --> 00:44:39,869 Yeah! 700 00:44:39,870 --> 00:44:42,149 We have a selection. Let's have a look. 701 00:44:42,150 --> 00:44:45,079 Yes, there we go. Second-to-last corner. 702 00:44:45,217 --> 00:44:49,096 Bold as brass. He's held it... No, he hasn't! 703 00:44:49,175 --> 00:44:53,337 That's a tank-slapper, that one was. Yeah. Here we go again. 704 00:44:55,110 --> 00:44:57,869 Now... Spinny! 705 00:45:00,390 --> 00:45:03,909 Why are we applauding? Those were mistakes. 706 00:45:03,910 --> 00:45:08,789 You probably want to have a different spin award... Yeah. 707 00:45:08,790 --> 00:45:11,189 Who would like to see the finished lap? 708 00:45:11,190 --> 00:45:14,829 - Yeah! - Let's play the tape. Here we go. 709 00:45:17,310 --> 00:45:20,949 Needs to spin with an automatic box. Like to see it! 710 00:45:21,348 --> 00:45:23,268 Right, here we go. 711 00:45:24,521 --> 00:45:28,561 Here's the first corner. Wide line, like a Formula 1 driver. 712 00:45:29,124 --> 00:45:31,132 Tyre squeal... even in the wet! 713 00:45:31,718 --> 00:45:34,229 That's nicely done. That was nicely done. 714 00:45:34,230 --> 00:45:36,349 Brake... 715 00:45:36,350 --> 00:45:38,789 A man of few words. 716 00:45:39,547 --> 00:45:41,866 That's nice and smooth through there. 717 00:45:41,890 --> 00:45:44,210 Good wide lines, so you can get the power down. 718 00:45:44,322 --> 00:45:45,897 And up to the Hammerhead. 719 00:45:50,790 --> 00:45:54,749 Were you singing? To keep myself focused and stuff. 720 00:45:54,750 --> 00:45:56,709 I was getting kinda nervous. 721 00:46:01,733 --> 00:46:04,589 C apostrophe D now. Listen to that engine. 722 00:46:04,606 --> 00:46:07,741 That's a sporty noise. 723 00:46:07,828 --> 00:46:10,508 Go! Stupid car! 724 00:46:12,710 --> 00:46:14,909 Looking good through there... 725 00:46:14,910 --> 00:46:18,669 There's a bit of dirt from an earlier spin coming out. 726 00:46:18,670 --> 00:46:20,749 Through the tyres. 727 00:46:20,750 --> 00:46:24,709 Are we going to get through the second-to-last without a problem? 728 00:46:24,710 --> 00:46:28,269 That was cut perfectly. And Gambon... 729 00:46:28,270 --> 00:46:30,469 Keep it in tight... All right, don't. 730 00:46:30,470 --> 00:46:33,149 And there we are! And across the line! 731 00:46:33,150 --> 00:46:36,270 Wey-hey-hey! 732 00:46:40,510 --> 00:46:46,772 So... Now, you're driving the automatic, so that's slower, obviously, 733 00:46:46,828 --> 00:46:50,780 and it's raining, so we're not looking for a particularly fast time. 734 00:46:51,004 --> 00:46:53,671 But... I'm trying to think, actually. 735 00:46:53,710 --> 00:46:57,476 Automatic drivers... we've only had two so far in this car. 736 00:46:57,661 --> 00:46:59,780 They are John Prescott. 737 00:47:00,046 --> 00:47:03,249 You don't know John Prescott? 738 00:47:03,350 --> 00:47:04,989 He's a fashion designer. 739 00:47:06,670 --> 00:47:09,069 And Alice Cooper. OK? 740 00:47:09,070 --> 00:47:12,989 Those are the only automatics, and they're both 1.56. And they're wet. 741 00:47:12,990 --> 00:47:15,960 Yeah. Both had wet days, both driving automatics. 742 00:47:15,991 --> 00:47:18,390 Both in the 1.56.3 region. 743 00:47:19,110 --> 00:47:24,510 will.i.am., you did it in 1... 744 00:47:26,632 --> 00:47:28,029 40... 745 00:47:28,030 --> 00:47:30,069 Whoo! 746 00:47:30,070 --> 00:47:32,349 9.4. 747 00:47:32,350 --> 00:47:34,829 So, you get wet and auto, 748 00:47:34,830 --> 00:47:39,389 and that's the fastest we've ever had in that car in those conditions! Yay! 749 00:47:39,390 --> 00:47:41,870 You are... there. 750 00:47:46,142 --> 00:47:50,208 So, above Peta, 23, from Essex... Below Jonathan Ross. 751 00:47:50,350 --> 00:47:52,549 Stig did a good thing, then. Yeah. 752 00:47:52,550 --> 00:47:54,989 That was impressive, and you were trying. 753 00:47:54,990 --> 00:47:58,109 It has been genuinely inspirational having you here, 754 00:47:58,110 --> 00:47:59,771 and an enormous pleasure. 755 00:47:59,845 --> 00:48:02,244 Ladies and gentlemen, will.i.am! Thank you! 756 00:48:04,990 --> 00:48:07,790 Thank you very, very much. Was that OK? 757 00:48:16,371 --> 00:48:20,060 Right, now, we must get back to our big supercar test. 758 00:48:20,150 --> 00:48:24,509 So far, we've established that my Noble is the fastest and the most economical. 759 00:48:24,510 --> 00:48:27,590 The most unreliable. Yes, funny. We've also 760 00:48:27,591 --> 00:48:30,669 established that the McLaren is the best around town, 761 00:48:30,670 --> 00:48:33,570 and that Jeremy's big, idiotic Lamborghini 762 00:48:33,571 --> 00:48:36,919 hasn't actually won anything. Nothing! Zero. 763 00:48:37,110 --> 00:48:40,474 Nil. Zilch. Rien. Nowt. 764 00:48:40,550 --> 00:48:44,749 The square root of Jack. Nothing... we've established that! 765 00:48:44,750 --> 00:48:48,109 Let's move on, because it's time now for part three, 766 00:48:48,110 --> 00:48:52,510 in which we three must face the most dangerous thing we've ever done. 767 00:48:56,350 --> 00:48:59,349 'As we headed north to our date with destiny, 768 00:48:59,350 --> 00:49:04,029 'we started to think about how our cars compare to the daddy.' 769 00:49:04,030 --> 00:49:06,349 Three days ago, if you'd said to me, 770 00:49:06,350 --> 00:49:10,349 "Which would you rather have, an Aventador or Ferrari 458?" 771 00:49:10,350 --> 00:49:14,469 I would have said, "The Ferrari." I mean, it's the obvious choice. 772 00:49:14,470 --> 00:49:18,829 But now... No, I'd have this. 773 00:49:18,830 --> 00:49:25,509 I know a Ferrari 458 is just a technical masterpiece and it looks wonderful, 774 00:49:25,510 --> 00:49:28,530 but this has got something the Ferrari doesn't have. 775 00:49:28,531 --> 00:49:31,550 It has... It has a character. 776 00:49:32,910 --> 00:49:35,509 It's like a big, daft orange dog! 777 00:49:35,510 --> 00:49:37,710 Everybody wants a big, daft orange dog! 778 00:49:40,950 --> 00:49:45,309 It's won me over. Completely. It's not just the best car here. 779 00:49:45,310 --> 00:49:47,589 It's better than the Ferrari 458. 780 00:49:47,590 --> 00:49:51,549 For me, it's one of the best cars in the world now. I absolutely love it. 781 00:49:51,550 --> 00:49:57,309 It feels like a race car but without the impracticality and discomfort. 782 00:49:57,310 --> 00:50:01,509 But, yes, they're a small make in the UK that nobody has ever heard of. 783 00:50:01,510 --> 00:50:07,430 Well, at one time, so was Mr Pagani, making his Zonda. 784 00:50:09,190 --> 00:50:13,029 So, that's two votes against the Ferrari. But what about James? 785 00:50:13,030 --> 00:50:16,309 This is brilliant. I'm really, really growing to like it, 786 00:50:16,310 --> 00:50:22,909 and let's not forget it's £35,000 or so cheaper than the Ferrari 458. 787 00:50:22,910 --> 00:50:26,109 And that is a huge amount of money. 788 00:50:26,110 --> 00:50:29,229 But there's still... I don't know. 789 00:50:29,230 --> 00:50:32,669 The Ferrari, I think the gear change feels a bit crisper, 790 00:50:32,670 --> 00:50:35,829 and everything feels a little better defined, somehow. 791 00:50:35,830 --> 00:50:39,069 It's the fizz, I'm afraid. I can't explain it. I just... 792 00:50:39,070 --> 00:50:41,990 The Ferrari still gives me more fizz. 793 00:50:44,190 --> 00:50:47,029 'You have reached your destination.' 794 00:50:47,030 --> 00:50:50,949 'The destination turned out to be a racetrack... 795 00:50:50,950 --> 00:50:53,350 'called Imola... 796 00:50:55,350 --> 00:50:57,549 '..where, after a quick change, 797 00:50:57,550 --> 00:51:01,469 'we were told to report to the pits for a challenge.' 798 00:51:01,470 --> 00:51:04,790 "You will now lap the circuit, attempting 799 00:51:04,791 --> 00:51:08,109 to beat the time set by a Ferrari 458." 800 00:51:08,110 --> 00:51:11,749 Who's driving a 458? It says here he's not The Stig. 801 00:51:11,750 --> 00:51:14,990 But he is The Stig's Italian cousin! 802 00:51:22,630 --> 00:51:25,069 It's "Bunga-Bunga" Stig. 803 00:51:25,070 --> 00:51:27,509 What's he been doing?! 804 00:51:27,510 --> 00:51:29,830 Cards. 805 00:51:32,590 --> 00:51:35,949 'Whatever it was he'd been doing, 806 00:51:35,950 --> 00:51:41,069 'he plainly still had plenty of energy left for driving. 807 00:51:41,070 --> 00:51:47,029 'And posted a daunting time of 1.56.6. 808 00:51:47,030 --> 00:51:50,389 'Before trying to beat that, we thought it best to spend 809 00:51:50,390 --> 00:51:55,670 'a little time learning how our cars behaved on a proper racetrack.' 810 00:52:00,390 --> 00:52:05,550 That gear change in track mode is absolutely savage. 811 00:52:07,230 --> 00:52:09,390 Ride that kerb! 812 00:52:10,990 --> 00:52:13,549 Four-wheel drive system is breathtaking. 813 00:52:13,550 --> 00:52:17,469 The power is constantly moving around... front, back, 814 00:52:17,470 --> 00:52:21,390 side to side... so you've always got the grip you need. 815 00:52:23,550 --> 00:52:26,869 The good thing is, I have carbon brakes which will not fade. 816 00:52:26,870 --> 00:52:30,390 Poor old Hammond has got steel brakes, which will. 817 00:52:31,630 --> 00:52:34,029 Focus. Smoothness. 818 00:52:34,030 --> 00:52:36,690 A car like this, with no driver aids, no computers 819 00:52:36,691 --> 00:52:39,349 messing about, it's just you and the car. 820 00:52:39,350 --> 00:52:43,949 The only chance I stand here is to get it out of the corners 821 00:52:43,950 --> 00:52:47,070 in such a shape that I can use that power. 822 00:52:48,390 --> 00:52:52,829 Of course, the McLaren does have a lot of driver aids, 823 00:52:52,830 --> 00:52:57,269 but Captain Sense Of Direction had more important things on this mind. 824 00:52:57,270 --> 00:53:00,469 What's this one? I can't remember. 825 00:53:00,470 --> 00:53:04,109 This is the bit where I don't have to brake... 826 00:53:04,110 --> 00:53:05,910 If I can remember this bit... 827 00:53:07,190 --> 00:53:11,949 At the end of the day, we knew the circuit and we knew our cars. 828 00:53:11,950 --> 00:53:15,949 But still, we were not feeling even remotely confident, 829 00:53:15,950 --> 00:53:17,950 because this is Imola... 830 00:53:18,990 --> 00:53:21,829 one of the most dangerous tracks on Earth. 831 00:53:21,830 --> 00:53:27,670 It's narrow, fast and ringed with unforgiving walls and trees. 832 00:53:29,630 --> 00:53:31,669 Gilles Villeneuve, 833 00:53:31,670 --> 00:53:33,589 Gerhard Berger, 834 00:53:33,590 --> 00:53:39,229 Nelson Piquet, Riccardo Patrese, Rubens Barrichello... 835 00:53:39,230 --> 00:53:46,109 at some point in history, every corner here has claimed the ego of a big name. 836 00:53:46,110 --> 00:53:49,350 And some corners have claimed even more than that. 837 00:53:52,910 --> 00:53:56,229 After Senna's death in 1994, 838 00:53:56,230 --> 00:54:00,589 changes were made to the track to slow the cars down, 839 00:54:00,590 --> 00:54:03,869 but even so, if we were going to beat that Ferrari, 840 00:54:03,870 --> 00:54:09,190 we would still be going through the first bend at nearly 200mph. 841 00:54:12,030 --> 00:54:15,330 So, that night, each of us spent a little 842 00:54:15,331 --> 00:54:18,630 time alone with the cars we'd be using. 843 00:54:19,670 --> 00:54:23,549 YOU are Juventus. 844 00:54:23,550 --> 00:54:29,709 And tomorrow, you're taking on Woking Town and Leicester City. 845 00:54:29,710 --> 00:54:32,029 And everybody in England 846 00:54:32,030 --> 00:54:36,669 is going to want them to win, because they're the underdogs. 847 00:54:36,670 --> 00:54:38,549 But don't you worry. 848 00:54:38,550 --> 00:54:43,869 We haven't won a single challenge yet, 849 00:54:43,870 --> 00:54:47,990 but tomorrow... that will change. 850 00:54:49,070 --> 00:54:54,109 You're not going into battle armed with a sophisticated computer and wizardry, 851 00:54:54,110 --> 00:54:58,509 clever suspension, four-wheel drive. You're just going in with an engine. 852 00:54:58,510 --> 00:55:01,869 Doing it the old-fashioned way. 853 00:55:01,870 --> 00:55:06,430 Underdog or not, I know you've got it in you now. 854 00:55:09,040 --> 00:55:10,839 I'd love us to win. 855 00:55:10,895 --> 00:55:13,775 Just remember, as we're going round and 856 00:55:14,142 --> 00:55:16,741 you're despairing of my terrible gear changes 857 00:55:16,795 --> 00:55:18,726 and my bad apexes, and things, 858 00:55:18,796 --> 00:55:22,374 you're made by McLaren. You've got the best race pedigree. 859 00:55:22,429 --> 00:55:24,296 You've got clever suspension, 860 00:55:24,351 --> 00:55:26,789 you've got no roll bars, you've got a computer, 861 00:55:26,790 --> 00:55:30,309 you can brake the wheel for me, you can virtually do it by yourself. 862 00:55:30,310 --> 00:55:36,429 All you have to do is humour me a bit, and remember that I'm Captain Slow. 863 00:55:36,430 --> 00:55:39,830 Or Mr Slowly, as the Italians call me. 864 00:55:42,225 --> 00:55:43,744 'The next morning, 865 00:55:43,811 --> 00:55:50,590 'we ventured onto this terrifying track to try and beat The Stig's 1.56.6.' 866 00:55:55,150 --> 00:55:57,550 God, this is quick! 867 00:55:59,550 --> 00:56:01,309 My giddy aunt! 868 00:56:01,310 --> 00:56:04,349 I'm off the road! 869 00:56:04,350 --> 00:56:06,390 I'm on it again! 870 00:56:07,350 --> 00:56:09,910 My God, I'm faster here. 871 00:56:12,239 --> 00:56:15,039 This is outrageous. BLEEP. 872 00:56:18,790 --> 00:56:22,230 Now, faster than you think. Don't be a wimp. 873 00:56:23,580 --> 00:56:26,380 A bit of wee may be coming out! 874 00:56:29,070 --> 00:56:32,470 Don't brake too early. Don't brake too early. Now! 875 00:56:34,510 --> 00:56:36,549 Better. 876 00:56:36,550 --> 00:56:41,830 'Unusually, we were all taking this challenge very seriously... ' 877 00:56:43,070 --> 00:56:48,080 A 5.4 to a 4.9. No. I'm still on 2.07. 878 00:56:49,647 --> 00:56:52,473 '..But we knew we'd have to try even harder 879 00:56:52,567 --> 00:56:54,569 if we were going to beat that Ferrari.' 880 00:56:54,626 --> 00:56:59,266 Right, come on, May, you blithering idiot. Avanti. 881 00:57:02,390 --> 00:57:04,149 Good! 882 00:57:04,150 --> 00:57:06,429 In... Braking down. 883 00:57:07,461 --> 00:57:09,069 BLEEP! 884 00:57:09,070 --> 00:57:10,270 Get cocky! 885 00:57:13,070 --> 00:57:16,230 The track WILL be there. Keep it in! 886 00:57:20,030 --> 00:57:22,349 Yes! 887 00:57:22,350 --> 00:57:24,310 I'm going a bit mental here, now. 888 00:57:26,990 --> 00:57:29,950 Brake... That's messy. 889 00:57:33,110 --> 00:57:35,910 I'm going to go for 5th. I'm going to take 890 00:57:35,911 --> 00:57:38,709 as much through here as I bloody dare. 891 00:57:38,710 --> 00:57:40,629 BLEEP! BLEEP! 892 00:57:43,070 --> 00:57:44,389 BLEEP! 893 00:57:48,150 --> 00:57:50,109 Come on! 894 00:57:50,110 --> 00:57:52,670 290... 895 00:57:54,110 --> 00:57:57,910 OK, brakes have gone. Failure from the brakes. 896 00:57:59,830 --> 00:58:04,509 After my brakes had cooled, and Hammond had emptied his car of gravel, 897 00:58:04,510 --> 00:58:10,709 we went back out for one final attempt to beat the 458. 898 00:58:10,710 --> 00:58:15,150 And the Lambo is only... Here we go! Come on! 899 00:58:17,350 --> 00:58:20,749 OK, this is it. I'm doing this one for Leicester! 900 00:58:20,750 --> 00:58:23,790 Right, beans! 901 00:58:27,110 --> 00:58:30,070 That's it! 902 00:58:35,550 --> 00:58:37,190 And now brake! 903 00:58:38,590 --> 00:58:41,069 I've done the difficult bit! 904 00:58:41,070 --> 00:58:43,789 It will go round, it WILL. 905 00:58:43,790 --> 00:58:45,190 Come on! 906 00:58:47,630 --> 00:58:49,949 And brake... 907 00:58:49,950 --> 00:58:54,750 And back on the power as soon as you can. Now. NOW! NOW! Power! 908 00:59:07,230 --> 00:59:10,230 Stay right, stay right, stay right! Stay right, now! 909 00:59:13,870 --> 00:59:18,269 Stretch it, stretch it! Come on! Come on! 910 00:59:18,270 --> 00:59:19,990 Come on! Come on! 911 00:59:23,190 --> 00:59:25,230 You can do it! Come on! 912 00:59:39,470 --> 00:59:41,989 That looked as scary as it was. Yes, it was scary. 913 00:59:41,990 --> 00:59:45,269 It's that palpable sense of, "My God!" 914 00:59:45,270 --> 00:59:50,109 Because I have to say, as you go past the pits, the track is not straight, 915 00:59:50,110 --> 00:59:53,709 it's a curve, and you daren't lift off, because the crews, 916 00:59:53,710 --> 00:59:58,349 they can hear the engine note change, so you have to keep your foot hard down. 917 00:59:58,350 --> 01:00:02,549 It was terrifying. It is 200 and...? Over 200. 918 01:00:02,550 --> 01:00:05,430 All three of us doing over 200, and that's faster 919 01:00:05,431 --> 01:00:08,309 than a Formula 1 car, was going through there. 920 01:00:08,310 --> 01:00:10,389 They could only do about 180. 921 01:00:10,390 --> 01:00:12,350 I don't know, because I had my eyes shut. 922 01:00:12,351 --> 01:00:14,309 It was terrifying. 923 01:00:14,310 --> 01:00:19,109 Anyway, it is time now to reveal who was the fastest of the three of us. 924 01:00:19,110 --> 01:00:23,469 Richard Hammond? I did it in 2 minutes and 3.3 seconds. 925 01:00:23,470 --> 01:00:25,229 That's the best I could do. 926 01:00:25,230 --> 01:00:26,589 Mr Slowly? 927 01:00:26,590 --> 01:00:29,909 2 minutes 6.4. 928 01:00:29,910 --> 01:00:32,549 Yes! And you? 929 01:00:32,550 --> 01:00:37,709 It's so difficult not to look smug at this point. God! 930 01:00:37,710 --> 01:00:43,109 It's not working. 1... 59.1. 931 01:00:43,110 --> 01:00:44,710 Well done. 932 01:00:47,230 --> 01:00:49,230 You're not pulling it off. 933 01:00:52,110 --> 01:00:55,469 It's not working. It isn't. No, I'll forget it. 934 01:00:55,470 --> 01:00:58,709 Let me just straighten this out, OK? Well done. 935 01:00:58,710 --> 01:01:02,494 We gave it everything, each of us, and we didn't beat the Ferrari. No. 936 01:01:02,565 --> 01:01:05,124 Hang on. That's not strictly relevant, 937 01:01:05,190 --> 01:01:06,930 because the point of this was to see which car 938 01:01:06,931 --> 01:01:09,109 you should have IF you didn't want a Ferrari. 939 01:01:09,110 --> 01:01:11,749 Yes, it's the Lambo. No. It isn't. It IS the Lambo. 940 01:01:11,816 --> 01:01:21,816 * 941 01:01:21,850 --> 01:01:27,727 It IS a big, daft orange dog, AND blue stuff comes out of the exhaust. 942 01:01:27,818 --> 01:01:33,377 No. Look, that Noble taught me more about driving in that one day 943 01:01:33,410 --> 01:01:35,689 than any other car has ever taught me. 944 01:01:35,690 --> 01:01:39,249 It's about the real undiluted experience. Silence. 945 01:01:39,250 --> 01:01:43,409 The McLaren is the closest thing to the 458, which is the best, 946 01:01:43,410 --> 01:01:45,157 therefore the McLaren is the best car here. 947 01:01:45,197 --> 01:01:48,476 It's that simple. Does blue stuff come out of the exhaust? No. 948 01:01:48,523 --> 01:01:51,722 Exactly. Well, there you are. The thing is, we can't agree. 949 01:01:52,490 --> 01:01:54,129 And actually, we never will. No. 950 01:01:54,130 --> 01:01:57,729 And on that bombshell, it is time to end. Thanks very much for watching. 951 01:01:57,730 --> 01:01:59,330 See you next week. Good night! 952 01:01:59,392 --> 01:02:01,533 Sync and corrections by APOLLO www.addic7ed.com